He had me from 'hello'...

It was over from the start,
you completely stole my heart.
And now you won't let go—
I never even had a chance, you know!
You had me from hello...

Here I go again, channeling song lyrics instead of coming up with my own, original ones...this one being *courtesy* of Kenny Chesney. But what the hey! Whatever works! And no, this Tommy isn't one of the *bad actors* I wrote about in my 5/30 blog—he's actually one of the good guys!

Our encounter was one of those things that sometimes just happens. Call it Fate, if you will. He was a top draft pick—"#2 in the draft but #1 in your heart," he'd chuckle—a hunky, 6'3" rookie linebacker out of Mississippi who I met when my friend Robin dragged me along for a night out with some pro football players—one who she knew through her ex-boyfriend but didn't want to be alone with. I went along—mostly to keep her company—&, possibly, have a somewhat entertaining evening in the process. But unexpected things do happen, & this night was no exception: from the moment Tommy & I laid eyes on each other we were gonners, & seldom apart in the two months that followed.

It was so natural—everything about it was just so right—that it seemed we'd been together forever. I did go back to his hotel room, but we did not engage in that furtive, first-time-sex stuff where you just ravage one another. Our love-making was sensual, tender. But then & again, everything about our relationship always was tender...

There was just one little glitch, though. He was married. Recently married. Up front with me from the git-go, he said he'd gotten a girl from college pregnant & *done the right thing*—no chance of a *happily ever after* or, for that matter, much time for us at all… Thus, we crammed half a lifetime into eight increasingly bittersweet weeks before Cherry arrived in town with their 6-week-old son in tow. I'm not sure we ever did utter the word goodbye...just clung to each other & cried—tough stuff for a couple of kids...

I thought about him periodically over the years, mostly wondering if he ended up staying with Cherry or not. Then, 5 or 6 weeks ago, I Googled both of them (see my 5/18 post, below), oddly getting far more results for her, which I thought was weird since he’d been a pro football player. Long story short, my search produced a bit of a shocker—an article in a professional journal memoralizing Cherry, who had passed away a year & a just few days ago. And he had stayed with her after all (which proves, to me at least, that even though we'd had an affair he was & is a man of deep conviction).

A few weeks later, when going through some old boxes, I found the pewter beer mug I'd had engraved with his nickname, the team name & year, & a line from *our song* which I'd planned on giving him before he left, but never had the opportunity to do so. I also ran across some photos that I don't think I'd really ever looked at before—one in particular was so compelling I knew I had to contact him. Here were two people who clearly adored each other, yet at the same time consumed by a pervasive sadness & longing we could never have possibly understood at our then-young ages. Even distanced by many years, the emotions I saw on our faces welled back up in me as strongly as if it had been only yesterday. These discoveries were a sign—I don't believe mere coincidence led me to search for Tommy now as opposed to five or ten years ago, or that, once I started looking, he became so very easy to find...

I could have called, because his address & number were both right there on switchboard.com, but thought it would be too great of a shock. I also doubt I could have conjured up the nerve to dial the number, listen to his phone ring, hear him say *hello,* & then say something really lame. So I decided it was in everyone's best interest to just send the mug, copies of the photos, & a friendly note with my condolences over Cherry's untimely death.

I entertained this little fantasy about hearing back from him, wanting to see me, for a couple of days. But I've already let it go because there’s no way in hell he’s going to call in the first place, never mind want to see me. I just hope the contents of the package will bring a smile to his face &, maybe, some happy rememberances… Stay tuned!